MONDAY
Phew! We’re back to just the one good-looking, charismatic David. All I can say is thank goodness for that! My mental health will be all the better for it and no doubt poor Mr Miliband’s will be, too. What a kerfuffle! He can bang on about his ‘I can’ philosophy all he likes, but when it comes right down to it he just so obviously jolly well can’t.
Still, at least the soon-to-be-disbanded ‘Kill Mil’ unit has been useful. Am off there now to change into my Kate Moss for Topshop off-the-(left)-shoulder cocktail dress, ready for swanky Policy Exchange five-year anniversary celebration tonight at the Four Seasons. Everyone who is anyone in the world of compassionate centre-right realignment will be there. Jed, Kate, Gids, lovely Mr Boles, Mr Maude — although he’s grumbling already on grounds that it looks too triumphalist to be having a party ‘at this stage in the electoral cycle’.
TUESDAY
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