MONDAY
Panic and frenzy. Nigel is calling it Dave v. Goliath. Sebastian says if the first draft of Dave’s budget response is anything to go by it will be more like the ‘Ramble in the Jungle’.
Focus group findings pinned to every wall — ‘If Dave was an alcopop, which flavour would he be?’ ‘Er, chocolate.’ The flatscreen playing a constant loop of Bush v. Clinton debates for inspiration. Every few minutes Nigel walks past whooping. He is wearing a Yankees cap. He asked me to get him a cup of coffee and shouted: ‘Go, go, go!’ This must be what Dave meant when he urged us to look within ourselves and find a renewed energy and vigour.
PM
Nigel has set up a Budget Day ‘holistic sub unit’ run by yours truly! Yes, I am in sole charge of a key part of the preparations for this week’s historic clash.
TUESDAY
OK, so I am in charge of getting Dave fixed up with a new suit.
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