Tamzin Lightwater

Diary of a Notting Hill Nobody | 19 April 2008

Tamzin Lightwater's unique take on the week

issue 19 April 2008

Monday

Big panic. Some of our candidates in marginal seats have been ringing up asking why they can’t find any nice piccies of Dave standing next to a flag which they can use in their leaflets for St George’s Day. Jed says we’re to tell everyone that there are such pictures, they’ve just gone missing. On no account are we to tell anyone about The Flag Rule.

As I had completely forgotten about it, I had to ask Wonky Tom what it was I was supposed not to be telling anyone. Thankfully, he remembered. It’s nearly as complicated as The Tie Guidelines. Roughly speaking — red, white and blue bad, red and white absolute disaster. Jed in the worst mood ever, storming round the office shouting: ‘We don’t do Britishness! …We don’t do Englishness! …We don’t do street parties! …OK?!’

Foxy also on the warpath.

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