Diary – 3 June 2005

Am I losing my puissance or has something gone disastrously awry with the nation’s young women? It used to be at this time of year — just as the sun started to shine and the first green blob of plum showed itself upon the twig — that they put away their shapeless cold-weather clothes in preference for a lighter, better fitting and more colourful summer garb. For that reason, how happy this time of year always used to be. But alas, no longer — not in the West Country at any rate. Down here the new fashion is to look as sickly and repulsive as possible. The teenage girls of Taunton have taken to dyeing their hair black at the edges with a heavy matt-white crest on top. This they call (for no reason I can divine) a ‘chevy’ and on top of their ‘chevies’ they spray some sort of fruit-flavoured dust.