The best moment of my Easter ended up being an impromptu debate with the delightful comedian Sarah Millican about the concept of ‘the ideal Easter egg’. If memory serves, Sarah may have preferred the large eggs with extra chocolates inside. I prefer the opposite — small, delicate ones with no extra treats. I hope my preference won’t be seen as another stereotypical middle-class protest against greed and excess…
I was asked to be a judge of the Churchill Awards, which celebrate the societal contributions of the over 65s. At first I thought it must be a mistake. Don’t you have to be old to do that? Then I checked. I am old. At the winner’s lunch at Claridge’s, Miriam Margolyes’s first words to me were ‘I’m hungry’. I sympathised, before hurrying off to check if I’d voted for her. Thankfully only winners were invited, which meant I didn’t have to feel responsible. I sat next to a nice man called Malcolm who wanted to show me a photo he’d taken of the gentlemen’s lavatories. I decided to go one better and get one taken of the ladies’ — albeit with me in it. The attendant turned photographer did an excellent job. She got me at a perfect angle. When I got back to show Malcolm, he’d scooted off to chat to Jilly Cooper on the next table. Feeling rejected, I put the image on Twitter saying: ‘Where am I?’ It went viral (which for me is 31 likes).
Book launch parties are golden opportunities to grab a gratis glass of wine and the odd crisp — although I accept the book itself still needs to be paid for. It’s best to leave them unsigned — more market value for gifting.
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