Q. On a recent short-haul flight, I had the misfortune to be seated next to a much older man who read, for the entirety of the flight, an erotic novel on his Kindle. I tried to avert my eyes but the bright screen and lewd language kept catching my eye. I was stunned into silence for the 1.5 hours I was trapped next to him. Should I have said something, and if so, what?
– L.R.B., Bristol
A. Certain bridge players complain they can see others’ cards – and no doubt they can, but they don’t have to. Equally, lewd language on a next-door Kindle can only be seen with effort but you cannot be blamed for making that effort. Most book lovers would make the effort to assess the compatibility of an adjacent passenger. Sadly you were disappointed, and of course it would be disconcerting to be physically wedged next to such a person. Perhaps you might have disconcerted him by bringing out a pad and sketching a caricature of a fat naked man.
Q. A close friend – a single man – is giving a birthday party in Portugal in a few months. It would make all the difference if another close friend could travel out with me, but since the host doesn’t know her that well he hasn’t invited her. How can I ask him to invite her too without seeming pushy and/or self-interested? Or indeed, without embarrassing him if he doesn’t want to include her?
– Name and address withheld
A. Casually ask him if he would like any help with the guest list. For example: ‘Would you like me to give you a trigger list to remind you of people who you may not realise really like you or you may have forgotten about because you just don’t have them in your contacts?’
Q.
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