Q. I have a delightful young goddaughter who, thanks to the virus, I have not seen since last year. Her next birthday is looming, but since she never thanked me for my present last year, I am disinclined to give another. However, there may be a mitigating factor. Last year while her mother and I were cheering her on in a hockey match, I handed the mother a bundle of cash to give her daughter on her birthday a few days later when she had an exeat. Now I wonder if the mother even remembered to pass it on. The trouble is I can’t ask her directly: first because, if she did remember, the girl will be in trouble for not having thanked me; second, the mother is chippy.
— E.B., Ipswich, Suffolk
A. Text the girl suggesting that, rather than buying her something she might not want, you will give her cash again this year. If she is agreeable, you plan to give her slightly more cash each year. Can she remember how much you gave her last year?
Q. Two very good friends of ours (husband and wife) are competent cooks and very hospitable. The problem is that they have become terrible food snobs and rarely compliment my own culinary efforts, even out of politeness. I have witnessed them running down the catering endeavours of mutual friends and am sure I have suffered the same fate. I want to continue to enjoy their company and invite them, but am reluctant to make the effort to provide what everybody else coming to our house finds quite acceptable fare, for such scant reward. Can you help?
— R.P., Kettering
A. The trouble with food snobs is that their palates can be so highly sensitive that they really mind food not being perfect.
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