Dear Mary: how can we stop friends inviting ‘locals’ to their house party?

Q. At my request, a friend arranged an invitation to lunch at an exclusive sporting club in a well-known resort. The friend did not accompany us, and on arrival my wife and I discovered our host to be a very senior member of the club and we were expected to join him at his own table. As lunch drew to a close and conversation flagged, I asked if I could walk around and inspect the various pictures of celebrity members, sportsmen, statesmen etc, which adorned the walls. In the course of my peregrination I was recognised by other club members who were eager to engage me in conversation. After a while my wife came up to me and told me our host was becoming annoyed at my absence. I hastened back to the table, but too late: from then on – and despite my apologies – our host was visibly frosty.