Dear Mary: How can I help the host at a socially-distant dinner party?

Q. As we attend socially distant events, we expect of our hosts a scrupulous accommodation of our preferences around physical interaction. What distinguishes a good guest right now is less clear For example, I know an offer to help clear the plates would be refused, and might even make other guests anxious about my getting too close. Yet remaining entirely static while the host works their magic around me does not feel right. So, Mary, how can I express my gratitude?
— C.L., Cambridge

A. Express the gratitude on arrival. Congratulate your host for having staged the much-needed social event in the first place ‘at a time when you, as host, effectively have to do double the work as none of the guests can help — for distancing reasons. I expect you would rather I didn’t even offer?’. This pre-emption will allow you to set fellow guests at their ease.