Q. I have been working in London as a receptionist in a private members’ club and consequently have had the opportunity to meet and chat to a number of single men – always while sitting safely behind my desk. Now I have left the job, one of these members has started direct messaging me and asking for a date, saying that he would like to get to know me better. I would like to know him better too. I sense there is more to him than the braggart he presents as – but the other girls who worked with me say he always lunges and only wants one thing. How can I see him, but without him pre-empting a proper relationship by lunging at me on the first date? He works during the day so dinner is the only option.
– W.F., London W11
A. You have missed the obvious solution. Forestall premature lunging by inviting your admirer to dinner at your own premises. You can get to know him amid the safety of a handful of other guests. To sidestep a kangaroo court scenario, do not brief the guests before the dinner but after it you can glean some feedback.
Q. A friend of a friend works for me in a secretarial capacity. I do like her and she is reasonably efficient. The deal is I pay her well and she works four hours a day. She used to come between 8 a.m. to 12 p.m., but now says it would suit her much better to come between 11 and three. I know this sounds ungracious, but she is only there for four hours and I want her to work during them, not eat lunch.
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