Q. I am spending the weekend with an old friend. She has a policy of putting clean sheets on her spare beds on Mondays, ‘and I don’t change them again until the following week, whatever happens’. I happen to know that this week has been busy for her and I cannot face the idea of having to get into an already slept-in bed. Don’t suggest I take my own pillowcase as she is likely to wake me with an early morning cup of tea.
Name and address withheld
A. When shown to your room, fling your stuff carelessly onto the bed allowing a small, half-full screwtop bottle of Evian water to be seen poking from your bag. Once alone, unscrew the top and position the bottle so that a few mls of water will leak into the bed — just enough to soak a key area of pillowcase and sheet but not through to the underblanket.
Comments
Join the debate for just $5 for 3 months
Be part of the conversation with other Spectator readers by getting your first three months for $5.
UNLOCK ACCESS Just $5 for 3 monthsAlready a subscriber? Log in