Mary Killen Mary Killen

Dear Mary | 30 May 2019

issue 01 June 2019

Q. A delightful but disorganised friend has invited several of our circle for a weekend at his family’s beautiful country home, having hosted a similar group last year. I have received all the particulars and accepted with pleasure. However, I know of another friend (in last year’s group) to whom the host mentioned the possibility of this year’s reprise, but she has not had full details. How can I delicately figure out if this is an oversight or deliberate?
— Name and address withheld

A. Ring the host and mention that you are thinking of asking for a lift with this friend but don’t want to put your foot in it if she hasn’t been asked. At this point the host will say that, sadly, for whatever reason, he hasn’t asked her this year. Or else he will say that he has (being disorganised he may think that he has) but she hasn’t yet let him know if she’s coming.

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