Dear Mary | 3 October 2009

Q. A close, though fairly new, friend of mine is an influential art critic. I suppose it is only natural that other friends should now be always asking me for his home address or to bring him along to their exhibition or to the exhibitions of their children. The problem is that they then send invitations which inevitably arrive with a mention of my name and so, even when the work is clearly bad, my friend feels he must attend the shows as a favour to me. I do not want to have all my own favours, as it were, used up on other people. Nor do I want to waste my friend’s time, but without being with him when he opens the invitations I can hardly reverse the endorsements. How can I stem this tide without seeming as though I am blocking people’s careers? And how do I avoid giving out his address when friends ask?

Name and address withheld

A.