Q. I invited a couple to Sunday lunch in the country, giving six weeks’ notice. Having had no response after four weeks, I rang, not unreasonably, I thought, to prompt for one. The wife answered her mobile on a train. She apologised for her rudeness, claiming that she had a very complicated life and it was hard to know whether she would be in the country or not on the day in question. However, she promised to let me know within a couple of days. Nothing has happened. I am not going to chase her again, but if this couple is not coming, then I would like to invite two other people instead. Mutual friends say that the couple in question have a reputation for ringing at the very last moment to apologise for being flaky but to say they are available. I know it seems stuffy, but I can only seat eight at my table and it does not work to cram in ten. How can I therefore un-invite this couple without lying about the fact that we have not cancelled the lunch but have asked other people instead? Please advise.
Name and address withheld
A. Play the flaky couple at their own game and send a friendly but vague postcard whose last line announces, ‘By the way we have had to postpone our lunch for you on the 28th but let’s meet soon.’ The key words ‘for you’ will exculpate you from any double-dealing should they find out you have entertained others.
Q. I have a cleaner who comes in three times a week. I love her and she is very maternal towards me but she has given me a present of a really hideous skirt.
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