Mary Killen Mary Killen

Dear Mary | 19 November 2015

Plus: How to avoid offending people you don’t recognise during Christmas party season

issue 21 November 2015

Q. I work in the London art market. Often, when I run into a fellow dealer and ask how they are in a friendly way, I get a reply along the lines of ‘It’s been totally mad. I’ve just come back from New York and I’m about to go to Hong Kong, then it’s Dubai the week after that…’ Clearly these people imagine that rushing around the world suggests that they are incredibly successful, when paradoxically all this exertion shows that unfortunately the opposite is the case. I usually say ‘Gosh you must be busy!’ but am beginning to feel that it would be kinder not to pretend to buy into their self-delusion. What would you recommend, Mary?
— Name and address withheld

A. The correct response is ‘Oh, poor you.’ Pronounce these words while wearing a caring expression. Then stay silent as they expand on why the rollercoaster ride has been necessary.

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