Q. My new boyfriend holds his knife like a pencil. How can I gently correct this without him thinking I am starting to nag too early on in the relationship? My parents will be appalled.
— Name withheld, Godalming, Surrey
A. You may be unable to break the habit but you can explain its origin to your parents. In the words of Madame de Staël, ‘Tout comprendre rend très indulgent.’ The epidemic of incorrect knife-holding is an evolutionary response to the mass production of painful cutlery. Until the 1950s even cheap cutlery was moulded and the handles attached to the blades. Then cutlery began to be made by stamping out the knives and forks in one piece, resulting in knives for public use which dig like tent pegs into the palm of the hand. Users had to adapt to survive and HKLP (holds-knife-like-pencil in Mitford code) is no longer a class indication.
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