Q. I am a disabled man with a good brain and an independent bent. However, I need help to wash and dress, morning and night. My private carer is excellent in every way but one. He’s experienced, willing, caring, utterly reliable and trustworthy — but he’s also bossy and controlling. He insists on staying for coffee with me, lingers longer than he needs to, passes comment on my life and wants to be my close friend. I find this oppressive. How can I tactfully manage it?
— Name and address withheld
A. Solve this problem by adding to your carer’s workload. Why not adopt, from a rescue home, a three-legged, ten-year-old labrador or similar, which will also need a bit of attention and exercise? This will at least distract your carer. More pertinently, it will allow your carer to channel his admiration and affection for you through a disabled canine proxy.
Q.
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