Since every mafiosi’s favourite movie is Goodfellas and favourite TV programme is The Sopranos, I suppose similar rules apply to Islamic terrorists and Sleeper Cell (Channel 4). Probably, every Wednesday night secretive groups of sinister bearded men all over Britain tune in in the eager hope that this will be the episode when scary Faris Al-Farik (Oded Fehr) finally gets to blow thousands of infidels into a million pieces.
I dare say they will also be watching to see whether American scriptwriters have any useful insights into the Islamic terrorist mindset. If so, they’re going be disappointed. Sleeper Cell is just another generic action-drama series like a cross between The Dirty Dozen and a slightly slower 24. One of the team is blond and all- American; one’s black; one’s happy-go-lucky and kooky; one’s the strong, silent type. This could just as easily be a bank-heist thriller or daring-mission war movie as a terrorist one.
But, then, imagine how boring it would be if they’d made the Sleeper Cell characters like sleeper-cell characters seem to be in real life: the apparently gentle, bearded, prayerful one; the apparently gentle, bearded, prayerful one; the apparently gentle, bearded, prayerful one; and the apparently gentle, bearded prayerful one. (Have you noticed that whenever they arrest a new suspect, one of his mates is always quoted on the news saying: ‘They’ve definitely got the wrong man. He wouldn’t hurt a flea. He’s really gentle.’ Deport all gentle Muslims at once, say I.)
Then again, appearances are deceptive. You’d think that Osama bin Laden was another solemn ascetic, but according to last week’s Pop Bitch — so it must be true — his favourite TV programme is Miami Vice, he’s obsessed with Whitney Houston and he likes his girlfriends to dance naked to ‘Rock Lobster’ by the B52s while he shouts at them: ‘Dance like a Caucasoid girl.’
Comments
Join the debate for just £1 a month
Be part of the conversation with other Spectator readers by getting your first three months for £3.
UNLOCK ACCESS Just £1 a monthAlready a subscriber? Log in