Could a therapist fix my philandering?

Is it poor little ol’ me imagining things, or are Americans becoming stupider by the minute? I’ve been travelling and running into the species, and I swear that the most intelligent thing I’ve heard recently from a New Yorker is: ‘Like, you know, like uh, you know, uh, like uh…’ This particular moron was talking in a loud voice and didn’t give the impression of having been hit rather hard over the head with a baseball bat. There he was, just another inarticulate and tongue-tied youngster showing signs of early-onset dementia brought on by watching too much television.

Once upon a time, American ‘exceptionalism’ drove the New World’s ascendancy in a number of fields, including the arts. So what happened? It’s a difficult question to answer, but the Gringos seem to be inured to brain-deadening TV and movies, hamburgers, celebrity worship, drugs, anti-depressants, video games, #MeToo-ism and psychoanalysis.

Let’s take it from the top.