Competition | 29 November 2008

Lucy Vickery presents the latest competition

In Competition No. 2572 you were invited to provide a rugby- or football-style song for another sport. After I’d set the assignment, it occurred to me that it runs counter to the spirit of football chants and rugby songs, which seem to arise spontaneously on the terraces and in the pub rather than being laboriously composed at home by dedicated chant-writers. The best are almost always lewd and often downright offensive — as W.J. Webster commented, they make Jonathan Ross sound prim — and while they are undoubtedly funny when heard in context, they look crass on the page.

So congratulations to those of you who managed to capture something of the spontaneity, bawdiness and cruel wit of the best chants and songs while still remaining printable. The winners below get £25 except Bill Greenwell, who gets £30.
Please note, Christmas printing deadlines mean an earlier-than-usual closing date for the next comp.