Competition | 26 June 2010

In Competition No. 2652 you were invited to submit an extract from the autobiography of a sportsman packed with as many clichés as possible.

The World Cup will no doubt provide a feast of words and phrases that have had the life squeezed out of them, as well as ample opportunity to mock players and pundits for their unimaginative use of language. But no less a literary giant than Kazuo Ishiguro has come to the defence of footballing clichés, describing them as poignant and beautiful. ‘At the end of the day’ was singled out by the Booker prize-winning author as an expression of stoic ruefulness that comes close to reflecting the true human condition.

That and the classic ‘Early doors’ (which, I was disappointed to discover, was not in fact invented by Ron Atkinson but dates back to 1902, when it was used to indicate the moment when theatre doors were opened for the riff-raff to scramble for the unreserved seating) featured prominently in an entry in which you all gave 110 per cent.