Carry on camping

At last the BBC has worked out what to do with Graham Norton. The series How Do You Solve a Problem Like Graham? (sorry, silly me, Like Maria) has just ended and it was so achingly, screamingly, dementedly camp it made its host, clad in a suit which appeared to have been woven from aluminium thread with velour trimmings, seem by comparison as straight as Jeremy Paxman. Oh, the frocks, the heels, the lip gloss, the magenta and lime strip lighting, the audience stuffed with plump mums, and of course The Sound of Music itself! I guess that in gay pubs up and down the land they had blackboards outside boasting ‘Live, on the giant screen, Maria final!’ in the way that other pubs offer Man U v. Arsenal.

Older readers may remember the Mekon, the green interplanetary villain who hovered over the Dan Dare adventures on a flying saucer.