Back to square one

Switching energy suppliers is very much like switching boyfriends. As soon as you do it, the one you just left immediately drops their prices while the one you’ve switched to starts changing their terms and edging their prices back up again. It’s a ‘damned if you do, damned if you don’t’ conspiracy.

Three years ago, for example, I was stuck in a dead-end relationship when another guy came along and gave me a sales pitch that made my eyes pop out on stalks. He said all the buzz words: marriage; children; Nissan Qashqai (it’s a family car). So I switched.

Three years later I have only now been told about the small print. When he said he was very much looking forward to settling down quite soon what he actually meant was that he never intended to settle down ever. It’s only a matter of semantics but it certainly has landed me in a pickle.