At least these rioters hate the right people

I was unable to join the violent protests held by Class War at the Cereal Killer Café in London last week because I had to stay at home to supervise our gardener. Yes — I know what you’re about to say. It is indeed ridiculous that one should have to stand over workmen to ensure that they are doing a decent job. But there is a patch of lawn towards the rear of our grounds which the blighters always skimp on, believing that it is too far from the house for us to notice. So I stand down there, with a cheerfully expectant expression, as the surly little man goes about his labours.

The Class War march was not terribly well attended, despite the publicity it received. Perhaps many others who would have turned up were having similar problems with their own servants — here a recalcitrant and infanticidally inclined nanny, there an indolent and kleptomaniac char-woman.