My favourite bit of understatement ever comes not from a Brit or a Spartan but from the Japanese Emperor Hirohito. In August 1945, following Japan’s defeats in every recent battle and the obliteration of two cities with nuclear bombs, he broadcast that ‘the war situation has developed not necessarily to Japan’s advantage’.
At 46, I have lived far longer than most of the humans in the 300,000-year history of our species
Well, I’m sorry to have to announce that my cancer situation has also developed not necessarily to my advantage. Last August I was diagnosed with advanced throat cancer, and was started on a fairly aggressive regime of treatment to try to cure it. Sadly, although the chemo and radiation did a good job on the tumours in my throat and neck, I’ve just been told that my lungs are now riddled with the bloody things. The prognosis is not quite ‘Don’t buy any green bananas’, but it’s pretty close to ‘Don’t start any long books’.
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