In Competition No. 3071 you were invited to supply a demotivational poem.
This was your opportunity to come up with a bracing antidote to the world-view peddled by an eye-wateringly lucrative self-help industry that feeds on a mix of insecurity and the aspirational narcissism du jour.
You came at the challenge from various angles, but the opening to Tracy Davidson’s entry speaks for many:
It doesn’t matter what you do in life,
It’s just a constant loop of pointless shite.
Honourable mentions go to Adrian Fry’s paean to the power of no and to Douglas G. Brown’s 21st-century spin on Longfellow’s ‘Psalm of Life’. The winners, printed below, earn £25 each.
When you are feeling down, be sure
That worse is yet to come,}
The most that humans can endure
Is bound to come to some
Which could be you, so should you be
Uplifted for a minute,
Just dig a hole, six foot by three,
Jump in and lie down in it.
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